We Are Pleased To Announce Yooper Air Is Now Operating In Minnysota.

Also Serving Visconsin, Nort And Sout Dakota.

If you are travelin soon, consider Yooper Air, da no-frills airline. You’re all in da same boat on Yooper Air, where flyin is a upliftin experience. Dere is no first class on any Yooper Air flight.

Meals are potluck. Rows 1-6, bring rolls; 7-15, bring a salad; 16-21, a main dish, and 22-30, a dessert. Basses and tenors please sit in da rear of da aircraft.

Everyone is responsible for his or her own baggage. All fares are by free will offering and da plane will not land ’til da budget is met.

Pay attention to your flight attendant, who will acquaint you wit da safety system aboard dis Yooper Air Okay den, listen up. I’m only gonna say dis vonce. In da event of a sudden loss of cab in pressure, I am frankly going to be real surprised and so vill Captain Olson, because we fly right around two tousand feet, so loss of cabin pressure vould probably mean da Second Coming or someting of dat nature, and I vouldn’t bodar with doze liddle masks on da rubber tubes. You’re gonna have bigger tings to worry about den dat. Just stuff doze back up in dair little holes. Probably da masks fell out because of turbulence which, to be honest wit you, we’re going to have quite a bit of at two tousand feet, sorta like driving across a plowed field, but after a while you get used to it.

In da event of a water landing, I’d say forget it. Start saying da Lord’s Prayer and just hope you get to da part about forgive us our sins as we forgive doze who sin against us, which some people say ‘trespass against us,’ which isn’t right, but what can you do?

Da use of cell phones on da plane is strictly forbidden, not because daymay confuse da plane’s navigation system, which is seat of da pants all da way. No, it’s because cell phones are a pain in da wazoo, and if God meant you to use a cell phone, He would have put your mout on da side of your head.

We start lunch right about noon and it’s buffet style with da coffee pot up front.

Den we’ll have da hymn sing; hymnals are in da seat pocket in front of you. Don’t take yours wit you when you go or I am going to be real upset and I am not kiddin !

Right now I’ll say Grace: ‘Come, Lord Jesus, be our guest and let deze gifts to us be blessed. Fadar, Son, and Holy Ghost, may we land in Duluth or pretty close’ Amen
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The previous announcement has been brought to you buy Yooper Air!
~Capt’n Chris

Filed under: TidBits | |

This is my least favorite day of the year. I wasn’t even going to make a post about it. I’m so disgusted by the events of September 11th, 2001 that I can’t stand to think about it- What it did to over 3,000 people… What it did to the world we live in now…. What it did to my industry. All of it… I hate it.

But then it dawned on me that people are starting to forget that day. Not that they’re forgetting the actual date, but rather, they’re forgetting how that day made them feel. People are like that, it’s just more comfortable for them. But that works to our disadvantage, because as soon as we forget, we get attacked again.

The videos of the jets slamming into the towers on 9/11 should be played every September 11th, if that’s what it’s going to take to keep people from forgetting.

Goodnight all
~Capt’n Chris

Filed under: Editorials | |

Sorry all, I just don’t have any energy tonight. We got to the hotel at 9 PM after a 10 hour day and I have to be in the lobby at 630 AM tomorrow morning. I get back home tomorrow though and I hope to be my ‘ol self, posting away as usual over the next few days. The tragedy of my old friend’s passing isn’t helping.

Thanks for all your understanding…
~Capt’n Chris

Filed under: Site News | |

Hey all… Just a little update for you- I’ve been out on a trip that’s had me getting into the hotels late and leaving early everyday. So that’s pretty much the reason for the lack of posts. But, I just found out that recently an old friend was killed in a freak accident. So I’ve been less then conversive from that, mainly.

I have Episode 16 ready to go… I just need to upload it- It’s the first interview here at PlaneMadness and I think you’ll like it. I’m going to try to do it tonight from my hotel room.

Enjoy the Ride

~Capt’n Chris

Filed under: Site News | |

Instead of calling maintenance out, from now on when something on the airplane breaks, we’re just going to kill a goat. Yeah that’s it!

According to this news article, in recent weeks one of Nepal Airline’s 757s has given them some problems. So airline officials just killed two goats on the ramp in front of the airplane with the issues, in the hopes that the mechanical problems would subside.

I couldn’t make this stuff up folks. Really, I couldn’t. And, according to a senior airline official, “The snag in the plane has now been fixed, and the aircraft has resumed its flights.”

Oh geez!
~Capt’n Chris

Filed under: TidBits | |